Battle Ground

Battle Ground

                Battle Ground is an ultra low budge shoot em up about bank robbers vs. a crazy nam vet. That hook alone was enough to make me (a love a Z grade Action movies) want to see that but the results are realty mixed. Think of it as Rambo vs. the guys from heat with a slasher movie style and you have a good idea of the movie.  The movie starts out with them just finishing a bank robbery with one of them injured. They are on the run cause one of them shot a cop now there normal means of escape will be delayed and cost more money. The idea of loose cannon on a team always bugs me. Why would you hire people on your team that clearly that insane? I mean no professional bank robbery team really wants some guy going all “Leroy Jenkins” by shooting up the place. It just counter productive. But that just my own pet peeve. The start of it gets you interested cause it takes you right into it. So they have to find a place to hide. They find an empty house in the woods thinking nobody there as they bicker on how the bank robber went all fubar. Low and behold this happens to be a house of crazy Vietnam vet who proceeds to hunt them down and killed them. An apparently does this to anyone who gets near his area. He sets up traps like a derange home alone kids and takes their money. Which cause the criminals to stay and hunt him down? There some nice kills and the set up of the battle ground are pretty sweet with a lot of secret passageways and good places for shoot outs. Problem is it no one to really root for cause both sides are dirt bags with very little remorse. So you don’t really root for anyone. You can have evil protagonist but you got to do something to make the audience follow them...make them exciting somehow. Something that makes each side somewhat rootable. Smoke Aces did this cause people had different hitmen they liked. Not so much here. Also you go into the clique that no one able to aim well in this...sense they can’t hit each other until the end. I mean this guy pretty old given when nam was…let no one seem to be able to get a shot off old man river over there. And it not like he a particular fit old mans…he has some city years on him. Still pretty fun. Some of the keys pretty imaginative and you can enjoy seeing the cat and mouse game. C+

Agression Scale

Aggression Scale

To understand the main character of this movie, picture the kid from Home alone if he was a complete sociopath...so basically picture the kid from Home Alone. This a dark take. Criminals break into someone house who stole money from them. It up to the two kids to escape as the bad guys tries to take them out. Little do they know the boy is lunatic with a history of violence and love to hurt people? It’s a pretty good twist. The kid is really creepy and when the criminals found out what they dealing with they have a nice “Oh $%it face” and some of the take downs pretty brutal. The problem is the brother and sister doesn’t have a great amount of chemistry together. I know there step ceilings but they don’t play off each other that well. The boy doesn’t talk...so it ups to the sister to carry most of the dialogue and exposition...and she not a good enough actor to carry that much weight. She mostly whines and kind of useless. The boy pretty good at his expressions but it a bit one note, Silent Bob this kid is not. But he plays a good lunatic. Although you get to the point where you say...dont these criminals have guns that can aim. Don’t the kids know where cops are or neighbors are or have Cell phones. Why they heck are they Rambo’ing it against these guys. Also the parents hiding the money kind of makes them the worst parents ever. All in all a nice fun flick to play if you have nothing to do C+

Get The Gringo

Get the gringo

Mel Gibson plays a Parker like Criminal who just did a robbery, and now escaping from the cops with a load of money.  In the first minutes, he is on a chase from the cops heading toward the boarder. His partner gets shots and he crashes over the border. His money gets taken and he ends up a prison that likes it own city, and his goal is to survive and get his money. Say what you want about Mel’s insanity...this guy knows how to make a moving and good action pacing. He plays a real scum bag in this that you root for cause he surrounded by much bigger scum bags. So you root for him. He also bounds with this kid in the prison and his mother that makes him more sympathetic. Yes it’s a cheap gimmick to make you feel for the character but the explanation of why the kids there pretty smart and add some tension. Also you know ever hard edge noir anti hero is puddy in a dames hand.  Lot of fun characters. He ends up double crossing and setting up the bad guys and it’s pretty satisfying. Now some may argue the realism of this prison, in fact I am sure the Mexico tourist board will have words with this movie. The cops are crooked to the point it makes Boss Hog look like Serpico. The people guarding the prison and the bad guys seem to have learned security from the cop from the COOKIE CRISP commercials. But it still hella fun if you let that go. Yea I said Hella...I am bad ass like that.  Not only are the character good but the world is a character.  The way its shot you can feel the heat and sweat.  You can feel the dirt and the culture that is around the movie. It a bad place to be by the story never that down beat. It’s like a twisted little theme park culture stereotypes.  The camera works is very good and show is music. It looks like a bigger budget then it really is. It could have been in theaters longer but I think it getting just a limited release…is due to Mel somewhat spectacular melt downs and less to do with the movie. It’s ashamed that he maxed out his celebrity F up card.  I say that not cause I am feeling sorry for him (he could of got back into people good graces if he played it smarter) but due to people might me missing out on a fun little flick. If you like a good modern noir crime movie you will love this

Bitch Slap

Bitch Slap is a throw back to Russ Meyer films. One of those explotation films that has hot girls, guns, and  cars that has not 1..not 2 but 3 actors from Hercules Ledgenary Journey. So you know its great. It has plenty of action,  All ending with a huge catfight that reach not only hot...but at a THEY LIVE "(the Street Scene) level hillarious length. Where even my boner started looking its watch half way through saying "Come on hurry this shit up...we got smurf porn pictures to look at". Not you may ask what about the plot. Meh.  It about 3 women of questionable backgrounds, One spy, one convict, and one dancer out in a desert. They are trying to break into this secret stash house of this super powerfull crime lord.  It has flashbacks going back and fourth. Now lets get this out of the way, the plot is dumb. Very…very dumb. But its fun. The actors all have fun, and they play it at a nice over the top way that really sales the feel of the movie. It nicely shot and the 3 girls interact with each very well.  The dancer character a bit of a weak link though, but that cause she not given as much cool lines as the other two women. The actress who plays the fugitive sales the bad girl thing well and actually seem like she could kick your ass.  Now if exploration but it not full out. It sadly no actual nudity, and the violence cartoony , with people getting shot but no blood. The last fight pretty damm brutal though.  Kind of wish they really went all out because this not a family film either way.  Then again Faster Pussy Cat Kill Kill didn’t have any of that stuff either. And this more in the vain of that so I can let it slide

Good neighbors

Good neighbors.

 http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1576440/

Finally, a movie that shows the dark underbelly of Canada. They seem nice with their maple syrup and love of hokey...but deep down it’s a savage land.  Story follows a man who moves to a building in Montréal during a time a serial killer roaming streets. He befriends a waitress (The main protagonist of the movie) with a love for cats and a wheel chair bound man. Each character a bit weird and each one could be the killer. The movies almost like a total different movie half way through. The first part is a slow character pieces that should be called the adventures of Lolcat girl and Wheels. The rest a nice twisted dark comedy. It was just slow to get there.  Part of that attentional sense they had to build up characters. Each character could be a killer but they don’t play it in a way that there constantly making shifty eyes at the camera. The all seem normal, and ok people but keep showing signs of oddness.  It all in a pretty realistic way sense you probably met people like this. It really that over the top until the twist. But I kind of wished the twist happen early and build upon that cat in mouse games. I say this because half the movie NOTHING happens. Then it becomes a pretty good movie. Also would like to see the character dance around each other once the other shoe drops. Now the ending probably not super realistic. The characters plan seems kind of dumb.  It relies on luck more than anything and it basically acts like forensics though exists. But still witty enough where I will let it slide. B

River Murders

A Seattle detective who a bit of a ladies’ man, gets into hot water, when all his past conquest end up getting murdered. Not only murdered, but murdered at places where he met them. It especially bad senses apparently the cop hitting wilt chamberlain numbers when it comes to how many woman he banged. Christ Slater plays a cop investigating/helping him.  Now one thing that may pop in your head how is a cop that looks like Ray Liota bagging this many women. Well I tell you something wise guy or girl.  Ray is a sex magnet…he makes the panties drop. He filled with so much sexual energy, that every time he masturbate, some woman around the world instantly gets pregnant. Every he unzips his fly, some lesbian around the world becomes straight. So think we got that out of the way. It’s a pretty fun thriller, and Ray plays it well. It plays a good down on his luck guy who world crashing apart. Christian pretty good as the guy busting his balls.  Ving Rhames has a nice scenes as his friend. The ending a bit iffy and kind of dumb.  Also how the killer knows about these women and so much about his life is kind of a huge stretch. Also there ending battle a bit anti climatic. I wasn’t expecting a bigger showdown and it pretty much just fizzle. But up to that it was a pretty breezy mystery. It not overly gory, but you see some elaborate crime scene set ups.  It’s a movie to watch in an afternoon when you got some time to kill.

The Caller

The Caller

                This is a unique that does the twist on the premise of talking someone through time. Imagine the movie Frequency and imagine if the guy in the past was a psychotic threatening to ruin their lives by F’ing with a passed.  The story is of a young woman who moves into an apartment. She ends up getting called by an old woman asking for some guy who lives there. The older woman is clearly insane and keeps assisting the guy lives in her apartment. The young woman says she isn’t. Turn out the confusion is to do with a wacky case of temporal physics, like a cross over with Doctor who and Threes company. The older woman lives in the past.  Somehow the phone allows them to talk to each other in the past.  She proceeds to harass the women from the president, killing people in the pass and changing the woman present. Only the two of them know of the changes in time. Pretty good movie. You really feel the tension...because it seems like the main character pretty much fucked. She always got some look she just constantly get shat on by the temporal gods, and it nothing she can do about. Some of the way she tries to get around it pretty good and cool.  Now you like got to get passed the normal time travel holes.  Like how does she remember the changes? Bu hey, just goes with that one. There also some logic stuff. The older lady would have been soooooooo arrested at certain parts of the movie. And the young version of the main characters kind of an idiot. .  Also before the time travel reveal you wonder why the chick doesn’t just get the caller ID or stop talking to this woman.  You only hear the older woman voice, but her voice sounds to old then what she actually is. It sounds weird. Also the little girl voice sounds odd to. Also the twist ending seem tacked on. The X boyfriend was a bit to LIFETIME (Woman getting beat woman of the week) for me. But it was still a great horror film.  B+